So I wanted to shares some stuff that has been on my mind...
This is such hard work...I don't know if you can even imagine, without going through it, how much work I am putting into losing weight, changing my lifestyle and keeping it off! However, it is worth it! The results are amazing, and I often attribute the results to the surgery, but I have realized recently, that I have so much to do with it, my choices, my dedication and my work shouldn't be discounted because of the surgery. I feel like some people, not people in my life necessarily, really do look at weight loss surgery this way. They feel like it is a quick fix, and that the person can then eat whatever they want and not gain weight and just keep losing. I really don't see it that way at all.
When I am sitting a restaurant and I can choose anything on the menu and know I can only eat 3-6 bites, depending on what I choose...believe me, the temptation is there to choose the fattiest, high carb thing on the menu, get 3 bites down and be happy. But, I don't. I choose lean protein, veggies, and indulge a little if I can afterward. When I indulge a little too much, as I did yesterday having some tortilla chips before lunch at a Mexican restaurant, I make sure I add my calories and carbs to my food diary and work out a little harder to make up for it.
Here are choices I make everyday, that are so important to my health, my weight loss and my lifestyle change being permanent (as opposed to just a diet):
1. Almost no refined sugars, carbs, or starchy foods. They are so rare now, as compared to my previous life, that it would have seemed impossible to me just 7 months ago. I do not eat any rice, pasta, or potatoes in general now, and allow myself a 1/2 a slice of toast every other day. It must be whole wheat, low calorie and only a half of a slice. The majority of my carbs now come from legumes, veggies, and fruit.
2. I limit my carbohydrates to 50-60 carbs a day from all sources, gross carbs, not net carbs. This is tricky, but as long as I stick to healthy foods, that are naturally low in carbs, and not just "Low Carb" labels, I do it easily every single day. (This is my nutritionists recommendation for me, please check with your doctor before lowering you carbs to this level)
3. I eat veggies at as many meals as possible. No iceberg lettuce for me, I stick to spinach, kale, romaine lettuce, and dark greens for my salads whenever possible. I love a small amount of lettuce with protein on top as a salad. I don't add croutons, but love seeds and nuts on top for crunch. I do steamed veggies on the side of main dishes, or incorporate tons of veggies in recipes that I normally wouldn't have added before. Like spaghetti sauce, I add bell peppers, carrots, onions, mushrooms, and zucchini to the sauce and puree it up. (Bonus: my kids don't know it is full of veggies!) and top zucchini noodles with the sauce and add a little cottage cheese over that for extra protein! I also make homemade mac and cheese, using cauliflower instead of pasta, and add butternut squash, onions, and carrots to the sauce...puree that and no one knows it isn't cheese sauce!
4. I make sure I get at least 80-90 grams of protein a day. Since I can't eat a whole lot, it may not sound like much, but I work out a lot, so I have to get my protein in! I eat protein before veggies at every meal...
5. Speaking of working out, I am at the gym 5 days a week! I do 30 minutes on the Elliptical trainer, at 5-6 mph and then do machines for another 20-30 minutes for toning. I work legs, arms, and core every day I am there. That is a lot of work, but it is worth it!
6. I still park further away from the entrance of stores, I choose activities with my kids that will get us moving, we have dance-a-thons at home and all dance for 10 minutes at a time! We wrestle, run, play, chase each other. Moving around is now normal daily activity for us, and it is a choice I make to incorporate that into our lives!
7. I cook, and plan our home meals a week in advance! We have a weekly menu now, and we eat out very rarely...I plan all our meals, making sure that the kids get all the nutrition they need, while my limits are respected as well. Sure my kids eat pasta, and rice, and potatoes. But I make them as healthy as possible, and I make sure whatever main course is happening each day, fits into my needs, so I don't have to scrounge around for food after cooking their meals. I also make sure that I have healthy snacks on had all the time so I am not tempted by foods they might eat. We also stick to whole fruits as desserts as a family, and no fruit juice, unless it is blended real fruit that I make myself, with all the fiber included!
8. I live! I don't completely deprive myself of everything...I allow myself a couple of bites of something if I really want it. I ate a small chocolate chip cookie the other day. I buy Dole dippers dark chocolate covered strawberries and eat 2 of the 4 pieces that come in the package. I allow myself a little something occasionally, so I never feel like I am on a diet. I try to never think of things in an, "I will never allow myself to eat that again" kind of way...because that would make me feel like I am being punished!
So, the surgery made me eat less...but the above are all examples of how I choose to live everyday, so that I can live a healthier, fitter, longer life...all things that the surgery didn't change, but inspired me to change for myself :)
Monday, October 27, 2014
Sunday, October 19, 2014
What is Normal?
So I had a big non-scale victory today! I went grocery shopping for the week, and walking through the store I didn't feel "Bigger", for the first time in my life I felt like a normal, slightly overweight mom, just out getting food for my family. I can't tell you how amazing that felt, like I didn't stick out in the crowd, like no one was starting at me and judging me. It felt so nice to just be there, like any other normal person would be.
I realize the shift in my thinking because the last time I weight around 187-188 lbs, which is where I am right now, I felt huge. I felt out of place, lost and I felt like everyone noticed me. It is such a nice feeling to just feel like I blend in, when for so long I felt like the attention was always on me for the wrong reasons. I didn't have anything to prove today, I didn't need anyone to validate me, I wasn't afraid of being an outcast in a world full of beautiful people...I just felt like one of the crowd. What a concept...
I realize the shift in my thinking because the last time I weight around 187-188 lbs, which is where I am right now, I felt huge. I felt out of place, lost and I felt like everyone noticed me. It is such a nice feeling to just feel like I blend in, when for so long I felt like the attention was always on me for the wrong reasons. I didn't have anything to prove today, I didn't need anyone to validate me, I wasn't afraid of being an outcast in a world full of beautiful people...I just felt like one of the crowd. What a concept...
Saturday, October 18, 2014
Things I wish I knew before weight loss surgery!
So, haven't updated in a while...but there are a couple of things I DO NOT like about losing weight, and I thought I would share them here.
I absolutely hate the feeling of being with other women and getting the sense that they are more uncomfortable with themselves and their bodies, because I am there. I have had this experience more than once. Friends I used to be able to bond with, feel comfortable around, and laugh and even have deep conversations...it feels like they have a tendency to judge themselves again my weight. It hurts, but not because it is directed at me, it isn't. It hurts, because I remember doing it at my highest weight, and I never should have done it! I just want to grab the arms of the women I am sitting with and tell them all the things that I wish I had told myself when I was bigger.
1. You are beautiful just as you are! Weight can come, and go...and does, all the time. What really matters is your authentic and genuine spirit, your beauty is SOOOOO much more than what you look like. The things that make you beautiful, whether you are in a 4X top, or an XS, are the same things!!! Please don't let that pesky number on a scale, or on your pants, make you feel unworthy, ugly, or less than! You are beautiful, and you should know it!
2. What you do with your life, is more important than what you eat! We have all heard the saying, "You are what you eat", Well, I am here to tell you that is a LIE!! You are not what you eat, you are so much more than that. You are a powerful, amazing, talented, giving, intuitive, elegant, gorgeous spark of creation! What you eat, is a choice. It has nothing to do with who you are, or the gifts you have to give to yourself, your family and the world around you.
3. We are not in competition! Life is not a beauty pageant, where women are judged by how skinny they can get, and how pretty they are compared to the other women around them. I know that the media, your mother, your Aunts, your sister(s), your friends, and you have all come to believe that our weight and beauty is constantly being judged by others, but it really isn't. The media has tricked us into believing that what others see, is the definition of who we are...and that couldn't be farther from the truth! Look in the mirror everyday, and say, "That is what beautiful looks like" do that everyday for 30 days, and I bet you will start to see that the brainwashing will start to fade...
4. You are not as fat, as you imagine. This is the biggest one of all of these, and I wish that I would have seen it before I started losing weight. I imagined myself as the biggest woman on the planet. I felt eyes on me all the time when I left my house, when I went to the store. I just knew that everyone was commenting, snickering, and heckling about my weight and how "HUGE" I was...guess what, most of them weren't. There are always jerks somewhere, but for the most part, people are not sitting around thinking, "Wow, there goes the biggest woman I have ever seen", when you are in the room. And if you are in a room with a complete jerk, then it is their problem and not yours. What they think of you, isn't any of your business, as they say!
5. You are loved. There are so many people who loved me just as I was, and still love me the same today. They loved me big, they love me smaller, and if I gained every ounce I have lost back, and then some, they will still love me. Surround yourself with those people...the ones who don't see that you are "overweight", but the ones who really see you. They will love you enough to love yourself, if you will only let them.
Many women may say that I have come to see these things because I have lost weight, but what I want you to know is, I still struggle every single day with these. Because my weight was not the part I struggled with the most. It was my mind. Our minds are so powerful, they can trick us into believing that we are unworthy of love...mine still does. I get into a room with beautiful thin women, and my mind says, "Wow, if only you could look like them, then you would really be beautiful" I have to remind myself of who I really am on a daily basis, because my mind got so lost in what I thought I was, that rediscovering myself is my moment to moment agenda. Can I say that I love myself more than I ever have, right now, in this moment? Yes! And in an hour I might be fighting with my mind again. I hope that one day I will be able to look in the mirror and see my real beauty, and I truly hope that each and every one of you will see it too. No matter what size we happen to be at the time.
I absolutely hate the feeling of being with other women and getting the sense that they are more uncomfortable with themselves and their bodies, because I am there. I have had this experience more than once. Friends I used to be able to bond with, feel comfortable around, and laugh and even have deep conversations...it feels like they have a tendency to judge themselves again my weight. It hurts, but not because it is directed at me, it isn't. It hurts, because I remember doing it at my highest weight, and I never should have done it! I just want to grab the arms of the women I am sitting with and tell them all the things that I wish I had told myself when I was bigger.
1. You are beautiful just as you are! Weight can come, and go...and does, all the time. What really matters is your authentic and genuine spirit, your beauty is SOOOOO much more than what you look like. The things that make you beautiful, whether you are in a 4X top, or an XS, are the same things!!! Please don't let that pesky number on a scale, or on your pants, make you feel unworthy, ugly, or less than! You are beautiful, and you should know it!
2. What you do with your life, is more important than what you eat! We have all heard the saying, "You are what you eat", Well, I am here to tell you that is a LIE!! You are not what you eat, you are so much more than that. You are a powerful, amazing, talented, giving, intuitive, elegant, gorgeous spark of creation! What you eat, is a choice. It has nothing to do with who you are, or the gifts you have to give to yourself, your family and the world around you.
3. We are not in competition! Life is not a beauty pageant, where women are judged by how skinny they can get, and how pretty they are compared to the other women around them. I know that the media, your mother, your Aunts, your sister(s), your friends, and you have all come to believe that our weight and beauty is constantly being judged by others, but it really isn't. The media has tricked us into believing that what others see, is the definition of who we are...and that couldn't be farther from the truth! Look in the mirror everyday, and say, "That is what beautiful looks like" do that everyday for 30 days, and I bet you will start to see that the brainwashing will start to fade...
4. You are not as fat, as you imagine. This is the biggest one of all of these, and I wish that I would have seen it before I started losing weight. I imagined myself as the biggest woman on the planet. I felt eyes on me all the time when I left my house, when I went to the store. I just knew that everyone was commenting, snickering, and heckling about my weight and how "HUGE" I was...guess what, most of them weren't. There are always jerks somewhere, but for the most part, people are not sitting around thinking, "Wow, there goes the biggest woman I have ever seen", when you are in the room. And if you are in a room with a complete jerk, then it is their problem and not yours. What they think of you, isn't any of your business, as they say!
5. You are loved. There are so many people who loved me just as I was, and still love me the same today. They loved me big, they love me smaller, and if I gained every ounce I have lost back, and then some, they will still love me. Surround yourself with those people...the ones who don't see that you are "overweight", but the ones who really see you. They will love you enough to love yourself, if you will only let them.
Many women may say that I have come to see these things because I have lost weight, but what I want you to know is, I still struggle every single day with these. Because my weight was not the part I struggled with the most. It was my mind. Our minds are so powerful, they can trick us into believing that we are unworthy of love...mine still does. I get into a room with beautiful thin women, and my mind says, "Wow, if only you could look like them, then you would really be beautiful" I have to remind myself of who I really am on a daily basis, because my mind got so lost in what I thought I was, that rediscovering myself is my moment to moment agenda. Can I say that I love myself more than I ever have, right now, in this moment? Yes! And in an hour I might be fighting with my mind again. I hope that one day I will be able to look in the mirror and see my real beauty, and I truly hope that each and every one of you will see it too. No matter what size we happen to be at the time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)